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Friday, March 23, 2018

Piano Hands

I haven't worked in 6 months.

I cry myself to sleep and had a breakdown in the bathroom today.

It's stressful.

I've been dealing with it by stress eating.

Donuts and Cake.

It's quite comforting.

They had a 2 for 1 special on the cake.

I haven't been posting on my social media or creating content because I have been applying and interviewing and being denied from jobs.

I posted on my Instagram today on why I haven't been posting and I'm ashamed to look at the comments and support.

How did my life get to this point?

Why didn't I just take the jobs in January???

Every day I ask myself, Why?

My family came out the last weekend... they kept asking me what I do all day... I didn't have the guts to say, "Worry about my life and how I'll make it here in Sacramento."

They were kind enough to give me rent money for my birthday.

I'm volunteering and running the Tough Mudder in Sacramento tomorrow and I'm not too excited.

It's $110 to sign up and 80% will be refunded after I volunteer.

When I signed up I put .con instead of .com and after I got denied from my UPS interview today I was on the phone with to get my email figured out and my registration ticket emailed to me.

Then I had to email tough mudder and explain that I can't get my start time because I put in my email wrong and then to figure out my volunteer time so it doesn't coincide with my start time had just been a mess.

Do you know your brain doesn't work properly when you are stressed?

Anyways I will be volunteering in bag check from 6 a.m. to 1 p.m. tomorrow and then run at 1:30 p.m.

Did you know you don't even get a metal in this race but a headband?

It's not as competitive as spartan but kinda an easy win race... we'll see how I do.

My training has been blah since I took that trip and just haven't been motivated... maybe this will be my last race.

Really I can't afford to go around and run and train...

I can't even afford donuts!

So this will be my last race and I have taken up piano.

My landlady has 2 piano in her house and my new roommate also plays so instead of running around everywhere... I will just stay home- save money and teach myself piano.

I have piano hands.

And as for being a personal trainer? I don't know.. I haven't been able to sell anyone a package for 6 months... maybe it's time to throw in the towel.

I applied to California Pizza Kitchen. Maybe G-d just wants me to be a waitress here in Sac. At least I will get benefits. And everyone loves pizza.

Saturday, March 17, 2018

#4. 50/50 by Dean Karnazes

This book is about how Dean ran 50 marathons in 50 states in 50 days.

Amazing and inspirational.

Tuesday, March 13, 2018

#3. The Luck Factor by Dr. Richard Wiseman

I love riding my bike around Sacramento.

I love looking through the free libraries around Sacramento.

So on Sunday, I picked up the book called...

The Luck Factor

Changing your luck, changing your life:

The 4 essential principles.

It's blue and yellow with a hint of red on the cover and it was a great read.

It talked about how we all receive luck in our lives but it's our choice on whether its good luck or bad luck.

After reading this book I decided to make everything that has happened to me in my life lucky.

My energy level soared and I started enjoying life more.

"If an unlucky man sold umbrellas,
it would stop raining;
if he sold candles, the sun would never set;
and if he made coffins, people would stop dying."
-Yiddish saying

"Throw a lucky man in the sea and he will come up with a fish in his mouth."
-Arab proverb

Do you believe your life as lucky or unlucky?


And what would happen if you decided that everything that happened to you was good luck?

"Somewhere along the line I made the switch and was able to look at the bright side rather than the dark side all the time. Now I look at everything and think how lucky I am."
-Michelle Pfeiffer

Principle 1: Maximize your chance opportunities.

Lucky people create, notice and act upon the chance opportunities in their lives.

Lucky people build and maintain a strong "network of luck".

Make a real effort to connect with more people, use your body language appropriately to attract people to you, and stay in touch with friends and colleagues.

Principle 2: Listen to your hunches.

Lucky people make a successful decision by using their intuition and gut feelings.

The only thing wrong with intuition is if you don't listen to it.

Lucky people listen to their intuition and use it as an alarm bell- a good reason to stop and consider the situation carefully. Many lucky people also take steps to actively boost their intuitive abilities by meditating and clearing their minds of other thoughts. They have the confidence to trust their inner voices and develop their intuitive feelings. In doing so, they reap the benefits of a lucky life full of successful decisions.

Lucky people listen to their "inner voice"

Lucky people take steps to boost their intuition.

Principle 3: Expect good fortune.

Lucky people's expectations about the future help them fulfill their dreams and ambitions.

Everyone wants to be healthy.

Lucky people expect their good luck to continue in the future.

Lucky people are convinced that these sorts of unpredictable and uncontrollable events will consistently work out for them.

Lucky people think that if their flight arrived on time in the past, then it will arrive on time in the future.

Lucky people see any bad luck in their lives as being very short-lived.

Our expectations have a powerful effect on the way in which we think, feel and act. They can influence our health, how we behave toward others, and how others behave toward us.

Lucky people attempt to achieve their goals, even in their chances of success seem slim, and persevere in the face of failure.

Lucky people's expectations about the future did not encourage them to engage in risky behavior. Instead, their positive expectations motivated them to take control of their lives.

Lucky people expect to be healthy and well in the future and they expect to be extremely fortunate.

People with more positive expectations about the future tend to take steps to ensure a healthy lifestyle. They exercise more, eat a balanced diet, take appropriate preventative measure and pay attention to medical advice.

Lucky people expect their interactions with others to be lucky and successful.

In the workplace, lucky people expect those around them to be productive and competent, and they expect their meetings to be successful and profitable.

In short, the interviewer's expectations affected the way in which the job applicants behaved. Positive expectations helped elicit the best from people, while negative expectations brought out the worst.

If I want something, I dream it through.

I would dream that I was wining it and receiving the prize.

Lucky people have very positive expectations about the future.

Convince yourself that your future will be bright and lucky.

Instead, it all comes down to her lucky expectations.

She expects the people that she meets to be pleasant, friendly, and helpful.
Visualize yourself experiencing good fortune.

Close your eyes and relax. Take a deep breath. In your mind's eye, imagine yourself in the forthcoming situation. Think about the surroundings, the people who will probably be there, the sights and sounds that you are likely to encounter.

Now imagine yourself being lucky and successful in the situation. if you are visualizing a job interview, imagine yourself coming across as competent and knowledgeable.

If you are thinking about a date, imagine yourself being confident and relaxed. If you are about to face a difficult meeting, imagine everyone being friendly and cooperative.

Think about what you will be wearing and how you want to behave.

Most important of all, focus on how you expect to be lucky and achieve your goals.

Now, slowly open your eyes and make your expectations a reality.

Principle 4: turn bad luck into good

Lucky people are able to transform their bad luck into good fortune.

Lucky people have an uncanny way of transforming their misfortune into amazing good fortune.

Lucky people see the positive side of their bad luck.

Lucky people tend to imagine spontaneously how the bad luck they encounter could have been worse, and in doing so, they feel much better about themselves and their lives.

Lucky people are convinced that any ill-fortune in their lives will, in the long run, work out for the best.

Many lucky people share the farmer's attitude toward the bad luck that they encounter. When they look back on their lives they often focus their attention on the benefits that flowed from their ill fortune.

Lucky people use this concept to soften the emotional impact of the ill fortune in their lives. By looking back and focusing on the positive things that resulted from their apparent bad luck in the past, they feel better about themselves and the future. If bad luck happens to them, they take the long view and expect things to work out well in the end.

Lucky people do not dwell on their ill fortune.

They let go of the past and focus on the future.

When people concentrate on positive events from their past, they fell much happier.

Mood also affects memory.

Lucky people take constructive steps to prevent more bad luck in the future.

So, Lucky people persist and have more constructive responses in the face of failure.


Lucky people imagine how things could have been worse and they compare themselves to people who are unluckier than themselves.

They take the long view and assume that something positive will come from their bad luck.

They don't dwell on the ill fortune that they have encountered.

They assume that there is something they can do about their ill fortune- they persist, think about lateral ways around the problem, and learn from their mistakes.

Turn bad luck into good.

Lucky people see the positive side of their bad luck.

Lucky people are convinced that any ill-fortune in their lives will, in the long run, work out for the best.

Lucky people don't dwell on their ill fortune.

Lucky people take constructive steps to prevent more bad luck in the future.

Do what lucky people to- take control of the situation and tackle the problem in a constructive way.

Moral of the story: Luck is a state of mind.

Confession of a drive addict: I guess I didn't consider myself lucky.

By now that I do... I feel as if my luck will magnify.

Monday, March 5, 2018

Burn Out

Confession of a drive addict: I have severe burnout.

Just listened to a podcast called the positive thread and she was talking about burnout.

I have all the symptoms.

It explains why I haven't been able to talk clients after my move for the last couple months and why I feel so energized after my short little vacation in Los Angeles and San Diego.

I have burned myself out before and I hope to not do it again.

You would think I could live and learn but no.

Burn the candle at both ends until you end up in the hospital... or in a room in Sacramento wondering why things aren't going right.

Burn out.

My brain has stopped working, my body has stopped functioning and I'm surprised I can even write a blog about it.

Will I recover and learn how to live a balanced life?

Well see.

Sunday, March 4, 2018

book list

I love reading books and today is the day I am going to keep track of how many I read over my lifetime because it's getting ridiculous.

Today #1. View from the Top by Aaron Walker. 

Finished it and actually got the chance to sit next to him and shake his hand at the conference this weekend.

Amazing guy with an amazing story and inspired me to be the best I can possibly be!

Getting better at tracking and starting with books.

I can't go back and think of every book I have read in the past but I can make note of every book I read in the future.

This also goes for everything else in my life.

Also, the guy who taught me how to lead mastermind... maybe it just might come to fruition.

Chapter 1 Self Love



noun: self-love

regard for one's own well-being and happiness

 (chiefly considered as a desirable). -

So On a scale from 1-10,

1 being not desirable and 10 being totally desirable,

where do you stand right now?

And if you aren't a 10... how do you get there?

You decided to be a 10.

Right here. Right now.

You are desirable.

You deserve happiness and your well-being is very important to me.


Take a deep breath and accept your desirability!

You have to look in the mirror and tell yourself I am desirable!

Confession: I have to do this every day.

Story Time: Ok I remember in middle school there was this kid that had this really ugly birthmark on his face, right under this eye. And I thought to myself wow, that kid is going to have some problems with self-image growing up. But the exact opposite was true!

He was totally confident with his self and his face and he was one of the popular kids.

When people asked what happened he just said, "oh it's just a birthmark."

It was amazing.

Now I know most of you reading this don't have a birthmark on your face but you may think you are ugly.

Get over it.

I think all men are handsome.

I think I'm beautiful.

What you expect from your life is what you experience.

Look, I know some drop dead gorgeous women who think they are ugly or don't like something about their body or face and I just look at them like...WTF?

Even I have pimples and it makes me really self-conscious.

Especially since my pimples always show up on date night...UGH!

lol but I just thank G-d for everything and instead of hating on my pimples I say Thank you G-d, now I understand what it's like for people with acne and their insecurities.

And If I can be beautiful with pimples... everyone can be beautiful/handsome.

Including you!

But it starts with self-love.

Some days I look in the mirror and tell myself ok I have one pimple but 99% of my skin is clear...

 so why am I just focusing on 1% when I can enjoy 99% of my skin????


Whatever you currently hate about yourself, start loving yourself!

Even I have to do it.

If I told myself in the mirror I was ugly my Instagram pictures would turn out Horrible!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But before every picture I take,

I literally tell myself I'm beautiful and this is going to be a great picture!

Hey, it works!

Secrets of success.

Start loving yourself today so you can love your woman today too!

And give yourself a pep talk before every picture!